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Anthropic accused Alibaba of running 25,000 fake accounts to pull nearly 29 million conversations out of Claude — then took the evidence to the White House. That was just the opening shot in a week the labs spent at war with everyone, including each other: poaching Google’s top Gemini minds, watching their own developer tools get pried open by anonymous strangers, and staring down Europe’s August disclosure deadline. The twist? The only companies cleanly printing money this week sell memory and silicon — not models.